I also
admit, this is one of those recurring misused words that, because of my particular
niche, I probably see a lot more that the average reader.
There are
few things more terrifying than a horde.
Just an overwhelming tide of opponents.
In history, Genghis Khan had hordes of warriors. If you play Warhammer 40,000, you know Orks
are often called the Green Horde. He-Man
fought an enemy army called the Horde, led by a guy named Hordak (no,
seriously).
And, of
course, zombies come in hordes. Great, sweeping, endless hordes. Something about the word just loans itself to a sort of mindless
savagery, doesn't it? In most stories, if
I’ve got a zombie horde on my hands, odds are I couldn’t carry enough
ammunition to deal with it.
If I have a
zombie hoard, though, it means I’ve got an unhealthy obsession with the
undead. I’ve actively collected far more
zombies than one person could ever possibly use. I won’t get rid of the broken or spoiled
ones, either. They just pile up in the
basement, the closet, and eventually in the corners of every room of my
apartment.
Hoard is a
verb, you see (to hoard), although it can also be used as a noun to
describe the thing I’ve been hoarding.
So a pirate horde is a bunch of guys with swords and eye patches,
but a pirate hoard is usually gold and treasure chests and stuff like
that.
So, also,
nine times out of ten, if I have a zombie hoard it means I’m an idiot who
doesn’t know how to spell and never bothers to look anything up. I might be a nice, well-meaning idiot, but
I’m still an idiot.
And I’m
definitely not a writer.
(In all
fairness, there’s a zombie news/collectors website called The Zombie Hoard, but
they openly acknowledge that their title is a play on words).
Remember,
Genghis Khan conquered most of Asia with his hordes, but they traveled light so
he’d never end up on Hoarders.
Oh, and if
you’d like to hear a little extra ranting this week, check out the fan page on
Facebook where I just put up some thoughts about the comic book industry.
Next time,
speaking of Genghis, I’d like to talk about getting active.
Until then,
go write.
Hoarding hordes does keep one occupied. Nice post.
ReplyDeleteMalcolm
Hi Peter. I'm a literary agent and I just finished Ex-Heroes. I enjoyed it tremendously and am moving on to Ex-Patriots next. Do you already work with a literary agent? If not, would you be interested in chatting at some point? Sorry for leaving this in comments, but I couldn't find an email address for you.
ReplyDeleteBest,
David Fugate
LaunchBooks Literary Agency
david@launchbooks.com
Ph: 760-944-9909
Well being a Zombie Hoarder would make for a great twist on the show 'Hoarders'
ReplyDeleteZombie Hoarder on Hoarders... damn, I wish I'd thought of that one.
ReplyDelete:)